Today I'm thankful for...

1. Sydney's generosity.  She is always thinking of others and is willing to share her gum or other precious goodies that she has.  After we brought Lillian to school this morning we went to the drive through window at the bank.  Sydney asked if she was going to get a lollipop.  I asked the nice lady behind the camera if she had any lollipops to give out, and while she went to go look for some, Sydney said, "Get one for Lilly too!"  How nice!

2. Board games.  Lillian wanted to come home before nap time today so I indulged her and picked her up early.  We had a lovely afternoon together.  While Sydney napped we played Curious George's Beach Discovery game, Snail's Pace Race, and two and a half rounds of Candyland (the half round came in when I won, then went back to the start while Lillian continued.  The head start was to help her win the game.)  We had so much fun playing that I put off doing the mountain of dishes in the sink, which pushed back the time I started dinner, which resulted in dinnertime at 7:30 pm- way late for us!!  It was all totally worth it, though.  Bobby was home for dinner and it was nice to have my little family together around the table.

3. The end of this rotation.  Yay!!  The girls made him a big CONGRATS sign and they jumped out from hiding places to say "Surprise!!" when Bobby got home.  I'm so glad it's over.  Tomorrow he starts anesthesia at the hospital close to Lilly's school.  He doesn't have to be there until 7:30 am!  That sure beats getting up at 4 am to be at the hospital by 5 am!  We'll actually get to see him in the mornings.  Awesome!

4. The rug on the floor.  This is the second night in a row that Bobby has passed out on the floor in the middle of getting kids ready for bed.  As I type this he is sprawled out on his back, with his arm over his head and elbow propped up against the toy chest.  His breathing is pretty slow and steady so I think he's in a fairly deep sleep.  Do I just leave him there to get the rest that he so desperately needs?  Or do I wake him up and get him into a comfortable bed? 

5. Peek-a-boo with Liam.  It's his new favorite game.  He likes to sit in my lap facing me.  I hold his hands to help him sit up, then I put our hands in front of my eyes.  When I take them away and say "peek-a-boo!" his eyes get really big and he laughs out loud!  It's the best sound in the world.

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Thriftiness.  That has been the topic for sacrament talks at church this month, as well as the lesson that Bishop taught today.  I'm thankful for the lessons I've learned from my parents on how to save and how to be disciplined in my spending.  I remember grocery shopping with my mom when I was little and complaining about how it would take her forever to buy stuff because she had to compare prices on everything.  Now it's payback time because I do the same thing, and Lillian and Sydney tell me to hurry up!  I'm grateful for the pattern my mom set for me and for the habits she helped me develop.  Another part of thriftiness is learning how to be satisfied with what we have and not lusting after things that are beyond our means.  It's easy to get caught in the trap of always wanting more than what we have.  But this is indeed a trap- and a nasty one at that.  It can turn into envy, dissatisfaction, resentment, anger, and ingratitude- all of which are things that make you feel down right horrible inside.  For me, feeling gratitude is synonymous with feeling joy.  Hence the blog.  :) 

2. Bobby's battle to stay awake.  He was so tired that he started falling asleep while we were sitting outside with friends after dinner.  When we came inside he played the Snail Pace Race with the girls, then he laid on the floor with Sydney to read the book she picked for story time- "Buenas Noches Luna" (Good Night Moon).  Not ten seconds after he finished reading the book, he fell asleep sprawled out on the floor.  Good thing Sydney managed to squirm her way out from under his arm before he went in a deep sleep or she would've been trapped under him!  I didn't have the heart to wake him up for family prayer or potty-before-bed time, so I just let him lay there.  He woke up when Sydney got out of bed to go to the bathroom again (like she does every night) and then he helped her get back to bed.  He crawled into her bed with her and now he's fast asleep again.  Poor guy.  Tomorrow is the last day of this wretched rotation.  We're going to have a party when he gets home.  And we're going to spend the month of May catching up on sleep.

3. Allergy eye drops.  My eyes have been killing me.  I think it's all the tree pollen in the air.  Thank goodness for the relief from my generic brand drops!

SATURDAY GRATITUDE:
1. Signing our four year lease!  Moving day will be some time in late June!  My dad came with me to do a drive by to see the house and to drop off the lease.  He liked the neighborhood and the park near by (and we like it too!!).  I think we'll be very happy here!

2. Chilly picnics at the park.  After seeing the house we went to the nearby park for a picnic.  It was a little cold, but we stayed warm with our hats and coats and had a good time.  Sydney and Lillian took turns spinning each other on the carousel, and Sydney had fun getting dizzy.  Then Lillian taught Grandpa how to give Sydney under-doggies on the swing.  Later we set up Lil's tee and watched her hit homeruns around the playground.

3. The Mother's Day card from my parents that I got in the mail this week.  First of all, kudos to my mom for sending it so early.  Usually my Aunt Tricia is the first one to send stuff way early, but my mom beat her by weeks this time. :)  Anyways, inside the card my mom wrote: "Sweet, Beautiful Amanda- You make your mother proud.  Hope you have a wonderful Mother's Day."  My dad wrote: "Love you, Da.  And love all the little darlings who call you 'Mommy.'"  They sure know how to make me feel good.  :)

4. Lillian and Sydney's excitement to get dressed up for a fancy party.  My girls are so great.  After our busy morning and afternoon yesterday we still had a wedding reception to go to at church.  When I told them it was a fun, fancy party they were immediately on board with the plans to get dressed up and go.  Despite our long day (and without Daddy who was on call), they were wonderful and we had a great time being there with friends.

5. Lillian's empathy.  This girl amazes me with her ability to be in tune with how others are feeling.  When we were leaving the wedding reception last night Lillian all of a sudden gave me a big hug and said, "Mommy, I'm sorry Daddy is on call, but I'm so glad to help!"  I just held her in that hug for a bit longer and told her how thankful I am to have her and how she keeps me company and helps me feel better when Daddy isn't around.  She truly is a good helper and she has such a good heart.

FRIDAY GRATITUTE
1. Dunkin' Donuts coupon for 2 donuts for 99 cents.  I took the girls after we picked up Lillian from preschool.  Sydney got pink with no sprinkles and Lillian got pink with sprinkles.  The nice man behind the counter gave them some extra Munchkins like he always does.  I loved the way Sydney ate her donut- she took bites out of the top so she got all the pink frosting off first!   I'm glad simple things like this make them so happy. :)

2. Income Based Repayment (IBR) for my federal loans.  I made some phones calls to change the payment plans on my loans in order to try to save some money.  IBR is a wonderful thing because it significantly reduced our monthly payments.  AND the government will continue to pay the interest on my subsidized loans for the next three years.  How wonderful!

3. Star gazing in Laurel Hill Cemetery.  It was part of science festival week in Philly.  After home-made pizza dinner with my dad at his apartment (now it's 'Grandpa's Apartment' because Grandma is in Chicago), we went to the cemetery down the street to meet up with some amateur astronomers and observe the night sky.  There was hot chocolate and Philly soft pretzels to greet us at the entrance and a nice little crowd of people when we got there.  We set up our blanket between obelisks and tomb stones and took some peeks at the moon through a few telescopes.  Lillian said the moon looked white with spots on it and Sydney said she saw a rainbow (probably a reflection of light off the mirrors inside the telescope).  Sydney wanted to see more rainbows.  :)  Grandpa got out his night sky app and looked at constellations.  Auntie Audrey was there too, and even Daddy was able to come.  It was fun to be out in the cemetery at night and to enjoy some [relatively] peace and quiet amid the busyness of the city.  Looking up always puts our life here on earth into perspective.

4. Big Sister Sydney.  She just loves taking care of her little brother.  She had her first babysitting job this week.  I asked her to watch Liam downstairs while I took a shower.  She took her job very seriously and she came upstairs twice to tell me that Liam was NOT crying.  :)  She likes to read him stories, too.  They're going to be great friends, I can just tell!

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Dessert with Grandpa. My dad stopped by after dinner to share ice cream cones with the girls and to bounce a smiling, drooling Liam on his knee. Lillian played catch with him, and Sydney rubbed the scruff on his chin. We're all excited about our big plans with Grandpa this weekend- pizza dinner at his apartment and star gazing tomorrow night, then t-ball and picnic at the park on Saturday! We will be making more plans to take advantage of Gpa's time in Philly.

2. Sweetheart. Sydney's favorite new word is "sweetheart". She likes to carry one of my purses around on her shoulder and talk to her imaginary children. She'll say, "Come on, sweetheart!" Or she will walk over to me, give me a kiss on the forehead and say, "Bye-bye sweetheart! I going to work!" Then she'll give me a little wave. So cute!

3. T-ball. Lillian started t-ball last Saturday. She got a purple team shirt and a matching purple hat. She's #9, just like her mama was! Thanks to Uncle Alan and Aunt Aimee, she's had her own glove for almost a year. I think I was more excited about t-ball last week than Lilly was. When we got to the ball field she got a little overwhelmed by all the people and the noise. Much to my disappointment she refused to participate. So while she sat on the sidelines with Liam, Syd and I played in the infield (on the pitcher's mound to be exact) while t-ball sluggers took the bat to the ball (and to the tee). Lilly has been wearing her jersey and hat around the house this week so I hope she will be more willing to participate this Saturday. I think she just needs to warm up to the crowd and get over her shyness. Maybe having Grandpa (another leftie!!) with her this week will help her.


4. Liam's smile! And his cute outfit that he wore to church on Sunday. Oh my, he looked adorable!



5. Playing in the dirt. This was earlier this week before the chilly, rainy weather came.


6. Bobby's schedule next year. I'm not really grateful for what his schedule entails, but I am thankful to know where he will be at what times. Last night the chief resident told Bobby that he was scheduled to be in Baltimore on a trauma ortho rotation for three months from April-June. Then he will be in Delaware from July-September. That's six consecutive months away. Ugh. However, today, it looks like the plan has changed so that Bobby will only have to do 6 weeks in Baltimore. That's certainly better than the previous plan. And I must add that I requested his Baltimore rotation to be in the spring time- when the weather is nice and I'm usually feeling the best, and it's not during any major holidays or birthdays. The summer rotation in Delaware is written into his contract and there's no changing that. Besides, being able to be in Delaware near family is a whole 'nother blessing in itself. I know his schedule is going to be tough next year- it's what we signed up for when we started in this together. He has made me a part of every decision he has made, and I fully support his efforts. It still stinks that it requires him to be away so much, though. Last night I started feeling really irritated and upset about it. Then I realized that my agitation was just covering up my fears- I'm afraid of not being able to handle things while Bobby is away, of not being a good mom to my kids because I'm too stressed out and overwhelmed, of feeling lonely, of feeling depressed, of becoming bitter and resentful.  I know that in the end everything will be ok. I'm just grateful that we're still in Philly where we have lots of supportive friends and are close to family. I can't imagine how much harder this would be if we were in a totally new city with people we didn't know. Having been here five years already, we've been able to forge some strong and lasting relationships that I know will carry us (me particularly) through the next hard four years. So here's to staying positive and optimistic- and for enjoying the journey even when it's tough.

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Team Charlotte Amalie.  The San Diego March of Dimes' March for Babies is this Saturday, April 28th.  Team Charlotte Amalie is trying to raise $1,000.  They are just over half way there, with four days left until the march.  For the past two weeks, Lillian and Sydney have been collecting change and putting it in an old sippy cup.  "It's money for Charlotte!" they say every time they find a quarter in the couch, a nickel in the van, or a penny on the ground.  Lillian even made a necklace for Charlotte and put that in the cup, too.  We have a friend whose baby girl died only hours after being born at 24 weeks- she should have been born around the time Liam was.  Her older sister Bently is Lillian's friend.  When I explained to Lillian why we were raising money for Charlotte and for the March of Dimes- for babies who are born too early and need lots of help from lots of doctors to get better- she reminded me that Bently's sister was born early and that she had died.  Then she asked me why that happened.  "I don't know," I said.  "No one knows why.  That's why it's important to help doctors and scientists figure out why it happens so they can find a solution to stop it from happening more.  That's why we are saving money so the March of Dimes can keep working so babies like Bently's sister and Charlotte won't be born too early, and so kids like Charlotte can get the care they need."  Lillian understood, and she's been an avid change-finder ever since.  Sydney reminds me every day that any change we find around the house we will "put in the cup for Charlotte!"  If you would like to contribute as well, you can visit Team Charlotte Amalie's official site to make a secure online donation at: http://www.marchforbabies.org/s_team_page.asp?seid=1716563

This is Charlotte Amalie when she was born:

This is Charlotte, 2 years and 2 months later:

Two little fundraisers with their money cup:

2. Voting.  Today was Pennsylvania's Primary Election.  My very wonderful friend Silvia came over at 7:30 pm so I could make it to the polls to cast my vote before they closed at 8 pm (Bobby is on call- surprise, surprise).  The nice ladies working the booth gave me some extra "I Voted Today!" stickers to bring home for the girls.  I'm grateful to live in a country where I can vote.  I'm grateful that the polling place is in the big condo building right across the street- I just walked on over and cast my votes!

3. Lillian's day off.  Philadelphia schools had the day off so we went to the library in the morning and played on the computers and talked with Ms. Liz, the new children's librarian.  We got some good books, too, and Lillian picked a Christmas Winnie the Pooh movie to watch (why Christmas? I have no idea).  Then we went to the store where the girls rode in the car shopping cart and Liam slept in his car seat while I got milk, bread, eggs, and other staples.  Sydney had fun pulling Lillian's hair in the check-out line.  Then we invited our two friends Jackson (same age as Lilly) and Traegan (same age as Syd) over to play for the entire afternoon.  They are moving in a few weeks, so we're trying to get in as much play time as possible.  After they went home we made cheese pizza and ate a picnic dinner while we watched Lillian's Christmas Pooh movie from the library.  The girls zonked out as soon as they [finally] got into bed.  Laim is now snoozing away, too.  

4. Our new lease!!!  It isn't signed quite yet, but I just heard back from the Landlord about the new terms for the house we want.  They agreed to lower the amount that rent will increase each year over the course of our lease.  That's good news because I don't think we would've been able to afford it at the current rate.  I'm so excited about this house and the awesome location it's in.  I will be so relieved when the lease is signed and it's a done deal!  And much MORE relieved when we are all moved in at the end of June!  This whole house hunting process has made me realize how blessed we are and how Heavenly Father is guiding us to the right place.  I was totally bummed when we were rejected on another house, but this one is much better- it's bigger, cheaper, close to an amazing park, and I have a friend who lives close by with kids the same ages as mine.  It's amazing how Heavenly Father will deprive us of one thing only to bless us with something even better later down the road. 

Today I'm thankful for...

1. The Park. We went to look at a house today. It was very nice, but a little too expensive for its small size. About four blocks away was a park so we brought the kids there to play afterwards. It was one of the most beautiful playgrounds I've ever been to- lots of trees, a little stream running through it with bridges crossing it, two separate playgrounds- one for little kids and one for older kids- with lots of cool climbing equipment and about a dozen different slides of various sizes and shapes, picnic tables, a BBQ area, a gazeebo on a hill....it even smelled good (earthy and woodsy!). I felt like I was in park heaven. I was just scouring craigslist again and I found another listing for a house that is located on a street that is on the other side of this same park. Hopefully we can take a look at it tomorrow. I'm starting to get tired of searching and looking and wondering when we will be moving. I want to move when the time is right and I don't want to rush into anything too soon, but at the same time I'm ready to be done with the process. It's already getting exhausting and I haven't even started packing yet (although I feel like I should be).

2. The way Liam sleeps with his arms above his head like he's Superman.

3. The way Lillian likes to wear dresses for special occasions- like today when we went to look at the house. And how she'll wear tennis shoes with her dress so she can ride her scooter at the park.

4. How Sydney and Lillian will play hide-and-seek in any closet they find.

5. Sleep. It's a precious commodity around here. Especially for Bobby. About six days a week he has to get up at 4 a.m. in order to get to the hospital by 5 a.m. to start seeing patients. Tomorrow is his "day off" but he still has to go in early to round on patients. By the time he gets home, eats dinner, plays or reads to the kids, talks to me for about 5 minutes and gets ready for bed he is lucky to have 6 hours of sleep ahead of him. I've never seen him so tired and exhausted. There is only a week and a half left of this rotation and I will not miss it one single bit when it is over. Heck, I won't miss intern year when it ends in June. I probably don't know what's truly in store next year as an ortho PGY-2, but at least Bobby won't be a grunt intern anymore and he'll be doing what he loves, LOVES to do. :)

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Dates with Grandma. Lillian had a special date with Grandma after school on Tuesday. They went to the car wash together, then they walked to the local Dunkin' Donuts to get donut holes for dessert, then they topped it off with a visit to the playground by Grandma's apartment. Today was Sydney's turn. I dropped her off with Grandma on my way to get Lillian from school so they could spend a few hours together before dinner time. They went to the same playground and swung on the swings "next to a baby" (according to Sydney) and went down the slide "a hundred times" (according to Grandma). :) They also went to the grocery store to buy pizza for dinner and an ice cream cake for dessert. Sydney even helped carry the pizza in the store for Grandma. But on the way to the store they made a special stop to visit the horsies at Chamounix Stable. Grandma said that as soon as she started driving across Strawberry Mansion Bridge (which is on the way to the horses) Sydney started talking about the horsies so they just had to stop. I had my own date with Grandma last week when she took my sister Audrey and me to the salon school to get spa pedicures and manicures. Now, not only are we bonded by our sister-mother-daughter relationships, but also by the hot pink nail polish that adorns our toe nails!! One-on-one time with Grandma/Mom is precious and fun. She leaves for Chicago on Sunday to spend a few months with my brother, his wife, and my adorable little 3-month old niece Anna. I will miss my mom a lot- especially being able to see her all the time and watching her play with my kids- but I'm so glad that she'll get to build the same relationship with Anna. Relationships are the most important thing we have in life.

2. Surprise parties- even if it's a farewell party. Since Grandma is leaving us soon, Lillian decided to have a surprise farewell party for her. While she was on her date with Sydney we decorated the house with balloons and streamers. Lillian made a big sign on the door that says "We love you Gma and Gpa. Love, Lillian, Sydney, Liam, Mom and Dad." She also made name tags to mark where everyone was sitting for dinner. Keeping with tradition when Daddy is on call, we picnicked on the floor. Only tonight was a fancy picnic- no paper plates and plastic utensils at any party Lilly is in charge of! Everyone (even Lil and Syd!) used "glass plates" and glass cups. Lillian lined up all the plates, put folded napkins on top of each one, carefully arranged the seating assignments, and placed forks and glasses for everyone. It was quite a fancy picnic. The service was great, too. Sydney served second pizza helpings for everyone and Lillian carried the salad bowl from the table to our picnic blanket so we wouldn't have to get up to get it. The after-party festivities involved bath time, taking a walk with Grandpa and Liam, eating ice cream cake, feeding old stale alphabet cereal to the birds in the front yard (Sydney helped herself to a few handfuls as well), book time with Grandma and Grandpa, searching under the bed with a flashlight for missing, fallen stuffed animals like Sydney's "chickmunk" (aka chipmunk) and Lillian's Beany Baby Easter Egg Bear, songs in bed, and finally falling asleep. Phew what an evening! Grandpa was so pooped out that he fell asleep sitting on the couch. It was a wonderful last hooplah before Grandma leaves Philly. We will miss her lots!!

3. Raffi. He's our new best friend. He has been our special lunch time guest all week long. Sydney has her peanut butter and Nutella sandwich and she requests to watch Raffi while she eats. Lillian wants to watch Raffi on the way to school. When Liam gets to watch he smiles and coos and kicks his legs around. Gosh, I love Raffi. I loved him when I was a kid and I love him still. He's good, pure, kid entertainment. No goofy outfits, no crazy act- just a good guy with his guitar, some great songs, and some cheesy jokes. What more does a kid need? For your watching/listening pleasure (and to take you back to your childhood days):

Today I'm thankful for...

1. 5 Months. Sunday was April 15th. We had some friends over after church for a BBQ and one of them asked, "So how old is Liam now?" I get this question a lot and I gave my automated response without thinking, "He's 4 1/2 months- almost 5 months." My other friend Silvia (she's like Liam's second mom) happened to be listening and she looked at me and said, "No. He's 5 months. He's 5 months today!" Indeed he was! Time is flying by. Thank goodness I have friends who are paying attention for me. Liam is certainly growing fast. He seems bigger (and heavier!) every day. He still drools gallons upon gallons and he keeps us on our toes when we burp him- we never know when he's going to spit up all over! His most recent hobby is pooping straight out the back of his diaper so he gets a nice poop stain on the rear side of all his onesies. He also likes sitting in the Bumbo chair, watching Raffi and Signing Time DVD's with his big sisters, staring at his hands like they are the most extraordinary thing to behold, shoving toys (and bibs and blankets) in his mouth, and playing with toys that make crinkling noises- like the new book that Grandma and Grandpa B got him for Easter. I just love that he's a little boy and that he's so happy all the time. My favorite thing to do with him is to kiss his big cheeks over and over- it always makes him smile!

Liam isn't looking at the camera because he's too busy watching "Baby Signing Time" on the computer that's in front of him. He's working on his couch potato (or should I say Bumbo potato?) look.

2 . Three times the charm. Sydney has spent three nights and three days without her baboo. I hope I'm not jinxing myself here, but each night is getting progressively better. She slept straight through the night last night without a hitch. She only asked for her baboo once the whole day. I'm quite impressed with how well it's been going. The last time I tried to cut her off from her baboo, she had hysterical crying fits in the middle of the night. That was months ago and I haven't been able to gear myself up for what seemed to be the inevitable miserable process again. So I was skeptical when Bobby wanted to try it again this week. I thought we should wait until next month when his schedule will be better. But it's been going great so far, and I'm glad we're getting it over with now instead of later.

3. "The kindergarten way." Tonight at dinner I asked the girls to tell me their favorite part of the day. Lillian thought about her answer for a long time (as she typically does), then she told me that during project time her teacher taught her how to write her name "the kindergarten way!" Lillian was so very excited about it, and although I had a pretty good hunch as to what this meant, I didn't want to spoil the fun so I asked her to show me what that meant. She ran to get paper and pencil (it had to be a pencil- she insisted) and she told me not to look until she was finished. This is what she showed me:

Yes, that's an exclamation point [!] at the end of her name. She's very into exclamation points right now. They go at the end of every word to add excitement! She'll write things like Lillian! LOVE! MOM! DAD! It's all very exciting!!

Just as I though, it was her name written with a big L and the rest of the letters lowercase- the kindergarten way, of course! Up to this point she has only used all uppercase letters- LILLIAN. She was so proud of her work that she showed Bobby when he got home and she wants to hang the paper in our bedroom. :-D I'm so proud of her and everything she has learned at school, but most of all how she loves learning new things. She's also starting to learn how to read. Today she read "Here I Go" all by herself. Other words she can read and write on her own are love, mom, dad, gma, gpa

4. Rain. It finally rained just barely enough for the girls to justify using their new fairy umbrellas from G-ma and G-pa. It was drizzling on our way home from our Costco outing. I wasn't expecting it to rain so I hadn't packed any umbrellas. When we got home Lillian asked me to go into the house to get her umbrella while she waited in the van. This girl was not going to waste any good rain drops on her head when she had an umbrella she could use. Sydney on the other hand came in with me, grabbed her own umbrella herself, then went back outside to play with it. It's funny how the girls are so different. Both of them enjoyed using their new umbrellas for a real purpose for the first time! And their matching strawberry dresses just make it that much cuter. :-)

Today I'm thankful for...

1. The horsies. Chamounix Stables is close to our house and more or less on our way home from bringing Lillian to school. Sydney always wants to "go see the horsies" so this morning we stopped and paid them a little visit. We fed them grass and clover from our side of the fence (where the grass really was greener), then we visited the fat little goat who is also a permanent resident at the stables. I love going here almost as much as the girls do. It has made for countless fun family outings during our five years in this neighborhood. I think I'm starting to get nostalgic at the thought of leaving this area. Even though we won't be going far, I know we won't be able to visit our horsie friends as often.

2. Late dinner. I didn't get dinner on the table until 6:30 tonight, which is a little later than usual. It turned out to be a blessing because Bobby came home a few minutes later (earlier than he had expected) and he was able to join us for dinner on a week night for the first time since...I can't remember the last time...it's been a while. During med school he made it a priority to be home for dinner, no matter how much studying he needed to do. I'm grateful for his sacrifice during a time when he could control his schedule. Now it's a rare treat to have him home for dinner and it's definitely something I miss. Family dinner time is important. I remember it around my dinner table growing up, and it's something that I want my kids to look forward to, to value, and to remember when they are older.

3. Growing up. Out of the blue Sydney said, "I don't need my baboo anymore!! It not hurt my teef!!" What a big girl she is!! A few hours later she cried for it when I tried to lay down with her for a nap. I fell asleep but she never did. Maybe she's growing out of nap time too. My little girl is growing up. *Sigh*

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Timing. Bobby was released as first counselor in the Bishopric on Easter Sunday. This past Sunday was the first time he sat with me and the kiddies during Sacrament meeting in just over four years. Boy, was it nice to have his help. It was a particularly challenging meeting that required three trips to the bathroom (2 with Sydney and 1 with Lillian), Liam needed to be taken out so he could fall asleep, and there were a few hair-pulling, toy-taking spats that needed to be [reverently] put out between the girls. I might not have made it without him. It was nice to have his help in the morning getting ready, too. It allowed me more time to prep my Young Women lesson. The timing couldn't have been better on that one.

2. Seasons and cycles. Last year (2010-2011) we got lots of snow. Lillian remembers going sledding down a hill in Fairmount Park and she points out the area every time we drive passed it. She also remembers building snowmen in the front yard and making snow angels. Every now and then when we talk about how spring is here and winter is over (finally), she gets a little sad and says, "but there wasn't any snow!" Very true- we had one lame dusting of snow this past winter (Although I'm not complaining. Un-melted snow in April is not my idea of a fun winter). It was barely enough to play in (which we did), but it was the crunchy, icy type of snow that's not good for too much except picking up in icy chunks and dropping on the sidewalk to watch it bust into a million pieces. Nevertheless, when we ventured outside to play on that snowy wintery day, Lillian and I tried to make snow angels in the yard. But alas, it didn't work. The snow was too hard and the angels did not look like angels. This makes Lillian sad, too. We were having this conversation on the way to school the other day and as I was trying to get everyone out the door and buckled in so we wouldn't be later than we already were, I made a reply without thinking, "That's why winter comes every year and we get another chance." What words of wisdom! Seasons come and go every year in one big cycle; each one gets its chance to shine and show its colors and its weather. What is missed in one season can be experienced in another; if we miss something one time around, we get a second chance when the season returns the next year. Our lives work the same way- we go through different seasons and experiences and we always get a second chance.

3. The Baboo Fairy. Sydney's pacifier is her baboo. Yesterday the baboo fairy came and took all of them to give to other children who need them. Last night was the first night she spent without her precious baboo. We survived it ok. She fell asleep fine without it and she didn't wake up until 3am asking for it. She didn't cry quite as much as I expected, and after sitting in the rocking chair together, laying down in her bed together, then having breakfast with Daddy at 4am together, she was ready to go back to sleep. I'm proud of her for doing so well without her deeply-loved comfort item. I hope she can continue to adjust well. And I hope I have the will-power to hold out until the baboo is nothing more than a distant memory in her little mind. The dentist says her baboo is to blame for her open bite and if we can get her off of it now then it will be able to fix itself. Cross your fingers for us.

4. Craigslist. We are trying to find new tenants for our house in Delaware. The current lease expires in June and we can't afford to let it sit empty for long, if at all. We've had a few interested parties but no one wanting to put in an application yet. We've been advertising since February. We are also looking for new housing for ourselves in an area with a better school district so Lillian can start kindergarten in the fall. We've looked at a few places but nothing has been the right fit yet. Craigslist has made the whole process- both finding tenants and finding housing- much easier, but it's still a stressful process. Prayers on both ends would be much appreciated.

Today I'm thankful for...

1. Field trips to the Please Touch Museum. I chaperoned my very first field trip today with Lillian's preschool class. There were so many parents who went that Lilly and I were our own group. We tagged along with a few of the other girls and Moms some of the time and we also got some one-on-one time together. We turned it into a date day. After the museum we got water ice together, then looked at a prospective new house to rent, and then we shopped for shoes and groceries at Target. It was quite a fun day and it made me appreciate the individual time I so rarely get to spend with her. I hope she always thinks it's cool to hang out with her mom. I'll enjoy it while it lasts, anyway. :)

No better way to start a day than with a carousel ride!

Lilly and Friend K

Friend B serves homemade soup in Alice and Wonderland's tree house. Lillian called it "Alex" and Wonderland!

I love this picture because it shows how Lillian is always on the go.

Road trip with girlfriend J!

Workin' it at McDonald's...Lillian's first job. Hey, you gotta start somewhere.

Co-workers. Pretty cute!

Mommy is a happy customer!

Then Lillian had a career change and decided to try her hand at being mail carrier.


But that wasn't exciting enough so she became an ambulance driver.

And then she worked her way up to being a doctor!

And finally she decided she was tired and she'd had enough so she became the patient. A whole team of doctors administered their care. She must have really good insurance.

2. The airplane that brought G-ma and G-pa back to Philly. The day that they flew in, Lillian and Sydney said they would look for their airplane way up high. Every airplane we saw they would say, "Maybe that's Grandma and Grandpa's airplane!" They came over last night to read the girls bedtime stories (during which Grandpa learned that he can not get away with changing the words to well-known stories that Lillian has memorized- and that her vocabulary is more advanced than he thought. "It doesn't say 'cry' grandpa, it says 'weep'!") :) Today Grandpa watched Sydney and Liam so I could have my date day with Lillian. We're going to take full advantage of the time we still have them so near!

3. Pretty flowers.

And pretty flower girls.

4. Bathtub photos. Tonight they all took a bath together for the first time!

5. Desire. Sometimes life gets so crazy that I feel like I'm hopelessly falling behind and I'm struggling to barely keep my head above the water. Nothing is enjoyable or joyful, despite the fact that I know I should feel joy and happiness. Instead I'm just trying to survive each day and trudge through life. That sounds pretty depressing, right? Well, it is. When I hit lows like this, which I have recently, the only thing I can do is hold onto desire. The desire to feel differently and for things to get better. As long as I still want to be happy, I know I can be. Somehow, someway, the happiness and the normalcy come back. Desire is a powerful thing. Sometimes it's all we've got. So hold on tight to it and don't let it go, even when everything else flies out the window.

6. Blogging. This is therapeutic for me. Good thing it's free. :)

Today I'm thankful for...

1. The smell of fresh cut grass.

2. The azalea bushes that are starting to bud and blossom in our yard.

3. Liam's ability to kick off his socks no matter how many times I put them back on. He thinks it's amusing. See?

Haha, Mom! My socks are on the ground. Again!

4. Lillian's ability to make Liam laugh. She takes pride in the fact that she can always make him smile by making silly faces and talking in her baby voice. She says, "I can make him crack right up!" Indeed she can!


5. Sydney's picture-taking skills. We ate dinner outside because the weather was so nice. Sydney got a hold of my camera and took these wonderful shots. She has a unique style. :)

6. Bobby's concern for me. On his way home at 7 pm he got a call from another ortho resident asking for help. He needed someone to cover for him in the OR at a different hospital for an emergency case that was supposed to start in an hour. Before saying yes, he called me to see how I was doing, how I was feeling, and to ask if he should do the case. I appreciate his care and concern for me, especially with what I've been dealing with lately. I know that he seriously takes my emotional well-being into consideration before making decisions like that.

Clear Skies

This morning I'm thankful for...

1. Rice Krispies. Sydney's favorite cereal these days. She calls it "rice krip-sies." As soon as I pour in the milk she puts her ear to the bowl to listen to it go "snap, crackle, pop"!

2. Albuterol. Lillian started coughing yesterday and it worsened overnight. This morning she has a low-grade fever as well. I gave her a breathing treatment with the nebulizer and her coughing has subsided. Her breathing sounds clear- no wheezing as of yet. I'm grateful for the medicines that help her. I often wonder what it would be like if we lived in a time when these medical treatments weren't available. I hate to think of how my children would have suffered so much more.

3. A clear sky and a clear mind. It's beautiful outside with clear blue skies, blossoming trees, and warm spring weather. Likewise I feel like my mind is much clearer. I was on medication for the past four weeks but I felt like my condition was just worsening. I felt chronically tired and spaced out with a constant underlying anxiety about everything. I finally decided to stop taking it and I'm feeling much better already. We'll see how things go without it, but for now I'm grateful to be feeling more like myself- able to enjoy the little things and able to conquer the bigger, harder things.